Each year I answer bunches of questions regarding how to simplify Christmas. Just a couple weeks ago I wrote about some easy ways for you to begin thinking about your Christmas preparations (Click Here for that article). One tip discussed thinking about how to make Christmas more meaningful for your family by planning ahead for ways you can give to others. Many families talk about helping a family in need or volunteering at a local community organization, but when the hustle and bustle of the season arrives those ideas sometimes get pushed aside. Our lives become so chaotic that we cannot fit in everything we had wanted to.

An important part of simplifying Christmas is defining what it means for your family. Each year I survey my family. I ask questions of each member to easily help define what is most important to them. I will ask some simple questions such as “What is your favorite part of Christmas?” “What traditions do you most want to continue when you have your own family?” and “What is your favorite Christmas memory?” Construct a survey for your family that includes questions about what you really want to know. Don’t make your questions too specific or too idealistic. You want your family members to be honest and truthful without a preconceived notion that you are about to take the FUN out of the holiday. To help balance out the survey ask some silly questions, such as “How do you think they clean the soot off Santa’s suit?” or “What is your favorite type of cookie?” These give my husband and I guidance as to what is important to our family unit, what traditions are truly treasured by all (and not just us), and what we may want to tweak.  

Of course, you will be taking notes as you go, but do not let writing down answers and ideas squelch your ability to fully listen. More important than your notes will be what each person will say without words. Watch for facial expressions, body language and eye contact. Listen for inflection, tonality, and choice of words. The key to getting the most out of your survey in an effort to help simplify Christmas without removing what makes Christmas special to your family is to listen intentionally. You will find that sometimes the answers themselves won’t illustrate the heartfelt thoughts as well as your observations.

Once you have interviewed each family member you will want to compile the results. Keep a tally sheet of answers by categorizing them in a way that will allow you to make a final list of priorities for the upcoming Christmas season. For example, you may want to have a Family Traditions category and list at least one tradition that is most important to each family member. You may be surprised at your findings. As a girl we always made tons of Christmas cookies. As a mom I continued this tradition. I would make myself crazy making cookies with my children. When I began doing the Christmas survey I found that making cookies was not even on my family’s radar! They enjoy the cookies, but making them is no big deal. Now, we make one batch of sugar cookies. I don’t require everyone to join in the decorating. The rest of our cookies for the season are a variety of drop cookies prepared through a process that has taken ALL the stress out of cookie baking for Christmas. Not only was I surprised that baking cookies was not a well loved tradition, but the first year I came up with the new plan it was actually a pleasure.

Last, but certainly not least, is to look over what your children hold most treasured about Christmas. Don’t be dismayed if your small children list getting presents as one of their favorite parts of the holiday. They are children and as such this does not mean they do not desire or enjoy the more important aspects. However, using your findings you and your husband can sit down and determine how to better incorporate more meaningful activities. Your result will be not only a more meaningful Christmas, but one that is decreased in stressed. Your mental focus can be on glorifying God and celebrating the birth of His son Jesus and having FUN along the way and yet still maintaining simplicity.

Take time this week to develop your family survey. Then put it into action. Making time for this activity now will help you to plan a more meaningful and simple Christmas season.